my love language's a touch was forsaken for quite long isn't it like riding a bicycle too? muscle memory jumps right in my body remembers the warmth the breath the shiver the surrender
artwork: embrace by Gizem Özer via http://www.saatchiart.com
*artwork- via pintrest.com
I’ve gone astray
Amongst the fir trees of my years
Under cold snows
Relived
During sweaty summer evenings.
I’ve failed to tie a string
Or leave a bread crumbs trail
So I can find my way back
(36 years ago)
When I slipped into this world
And maybe then was happy.
Invariably, i am
( a sad little girl- an angsty adolescent-an all accepting woman)
Just looking for a place,
One guarded and secure,
To keep my hopes.
*artwork- “reflection” by belle yang via themuseum.org
Every time I open my mouth
To let my words out
I witness the strangeness
Staring at me in the eyes of the beholder.
Will I ever be a foreigner to all the languages I’ve learnt to love?
My elusive place in this universe
Is concealed, hiding behind
The (un)dyeing hope to belong.
The walls that I’ve never built,
Neither real nor ones inside
Built themselves anyway and
Even translucent
They separate me from myself
And I can’t reach
The threshold of where I begin
And where the world ends.
The lines I’ve written upon the bitterness of my sixteen years
On the blue wall of my youth
Have they come true?
Two decades after, now
Am I able to distinguish
Between the secondary and the essence?
Am I able?
To take care?
To caress?
To enclose?
To embrace?
To accept
As a fact, as an undisputed given,
Every written mistake
Every word that will ever be left mispronounced?
Everything that I’ve had to forget
And suppress into the deepest
Every hazy image
Nostalgic
Refined
And loathed?
I will throw it all up onto the surface
And will investigate, thoroughly
Under magnifying glass
That is molten from chunks of my life
Scattered between here and there.
on my way up 