*artwork-“smoke” by brigitte werner via pixabay.com
|for more than two hundred and seventy days
i pushed away, it was not easy.
funny it feels, the tips of stiff fingers tremble
and heart pounds so fast.
this face in front of me. still precious? or is it?
covered with thin layer of curiosity
covered with thick layer of urge to destroy.
everything’s so familiar
these feminine hands,
hiding behind ever present cigarette
and convenient smoke.
i just wanted to say good-bye.
*artwork-“growth”, digital art by anastasiya malakhova
|the moment you were gone
the voice of my mind was heard again.
so tiny and so weak, yet, it is here.
i’m thrilled to have it back,
to execute my grief
and comprehend its startling solace.
so many tears, i never knew i could, forever, if it takes
but i do feel so much
and come across my brand new greenest leaves.
the agent of a change,
no other choice for me.
i’ll hold that mirror,
and when they’re ready-
i set them free to search.
and you became so ripe, so willing to explore and face
your own incubus.
my VIP, now you begin your journey.
i will be out there.
just as you asked.
i’ll keep an eye on you,
won’t let you fade away.
*artwork-“Christina’s World” by Andrew Wyeth.
|imagine metal lid over a deep hatch.
heavy. rusty. covered with dust. way out of use.
i tried my best to keep it closed
pushed with all the strength i had
and, boy, i may be strong with my eyes shut
but i received the permission, and i can not hold it anymore
it is free
and it is endless
and i don’t even understand what it feels like