love deprived whore on a days of hecate-15.12.09

*artwork-“don’t take my sunshine away” via tumblr

alone-black-and-white-butt-cool-favim-com-935965

sometimes i wake up in the mornings and i just know that it is going to be a bad day.

empty.

unfilled.

or, filled with dismay and anxiety.

and then everything gets slow.

arthur says these are the days of Hecate. so that i am sensitive during. and, in general, sensitive.

gera calls it “love deprived whore, with her heart locked”. that is also a way to put it.

it’s been a year since i am attending  to myself.

listening.

sometimes it seems that i do hear something.

is this how breaking through feels?

today i am restless again. i am not barren, but i can not give birth. there is something inside, yet it is unable to come out.

i am not letting it go.

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